Been Months!!!

Well there's news to be told! Jake and I are engaged! We're extremely happy and can't wait to tie the knot!

We have plans to get a place with Russell and my son in Utah hopefully by summertime.

Other than that, my life has been a nice boring calm. I need excitement!!!!

Falling Off A Cliff

I'm sick.

My body is not functioning the way it should. My right arm no longer works. I get sharp burning shooting pains all over my body. My mind is a fog.

I can't walk, talk, or laugh without intense chest pains.

I can't lift a gallon of milk.

I think I'm dying.

Please God help me.

Sprituality Is Awesome

My totem animal came to me yesterday by way of a raven (which happens to be a messenger from the spirit world if you didn't know). It's a rooster. Yeah I thought it was weird too until I read about what the rooster represents. I've been reading up on the "Other Side" lately and that is exactly what a rooster does. It helps you with your study of the Other Side.

I've learned so much in the past few days about what life really is and what it's all about and it's AWESOME. All of it makes so much sense! Basically we are all here to experience negativity as part of our soul's learning experience. There is no sin, there is no right or wrong. There is only knowledge. No one will judge you but yourself. There is no right or wrong religion, but most religions have lost sight of what earth life really is.

I also learned that you choose how many incarnations you will have on this earth. I'm still in the process of finding what my purpose here is. Everyone chooses 2 of 45 available themes to have in their current lifetime. I'm fairly certain that my themes are Intellectuality and Freedom. Well I am certain that my first is Intellectuality, but my second theme eludes me.

I also met my spirit guide yesterday. Her name is Amella and she lived in Portugal in the 2nd century.

I saw my own aura for the first time a few days ago. Absolutely fascinating! My next step is to work on my clairaudience, which I've had all my life. I've always said that I've never seen a spirit (until recently, as I mentioned in a previous post) but I have heard quite a few and felt them all my life. My rooster totem will help with that.

C'est L'amour

Yeah I don't speak French.

But I do speak love. ^_^

There are so many different kinds of love, and I finally feel like my life is filled with love. My little family is so happy now that we're together, and I've finally found a man that appreciates who I am and treats me the way I should have been treated all along.

Finally being pushed in the right direction; this is what I've needed all along.

Getting hired on the spot on Tuesday is going to be the first step in securing my future with my family and with my Jake.

I can't wait to get started! I have a shoot this weekend, then a night and day with my lover, Thanksgiving, and the first birthday I get to spend with the love of my life. The rest of my life is going to be the best years of my life and I can't wait to get started! I can't believe I spent the first 25 years of my life being pushed around and beaten down. No longer. Nothing but good times up ahead!

I couldn't have done anything, been anything, without Jake and my family. The people who love me regardless of where I've been or what I've done. I still have a lot to answer for, but I'm not scared anymore. Not sad anymore. Not giving up anymore. I deserve happiness, and happiness has finally found me.

I'm one of the lucky ones. ^_^

My Kid Is Santa Claus

My son just celebrated his 4th birthday! It might as well have been Christmas with how spoiled he was with presents. After he opened his presents, his aunt was talking about a project they are participating this year which involves sending toys to kids in Africa. My son is all for it! In fact every day since he has brought up how we need to buy toys "for the kids who don't have any."
I've never seen a kid so charitable! He is just so moved by the fact that these kids don't have anything to play with. How can a 4 year old be so selfless and caring?
I showed him pictures of children in Africa today and told him about the starvation and poverty they experience. His response? "Mommy! We need to send them food, too!"
I was just thinking to myself the other day how I wish there was a soup kitchen or something that I could volunteer my time at. It's been so long since I performed any sort of charitable service, and I've been missing it. It's so touching that my son is the same way. He always wants to help in any way he can, and it comes from his heart. I've never seen a child so willing to help in any way he could for someone less fortunate than he.
I'm so proud of my boy. He is shaping up to be an amazing person, and I can't wait to see what he is capable of achieving in life. I couldn't be a prouder mom.

Tarot Card Of The Day

3 of Pentacles

Working with others, the group mind, planning, organizing, achieving more than what is expected.

I've been getting this card a lot lately. I feel such a great oneness with my family and I'm sure that is to what this card is referring. Hopefully this trend will continue, as I don't want things to go back to the way they were. :)

These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things

Color: Green
Food: Sushi
Breakfast: Cheerios/Sausage
Number: 32, 7
Animal: Any panther.. except jaguars. They kind of look funny.
Soda: Pepsi
Alcoholic Drink: Margarita
Liquor: Tequila/Whiskey
Beer: Shock Top
Meat: Turkey/Beef
Vegetable: Artichoke
Fruit: Blackberry
Pizza Topping: Pepperoni
Restaurant: Happy Sumo
Salad Dressing: Ranch
Candy: Warheads
Flowers: Carnations
Holiday: Halloween/Samhain or Thanksgiving
Time of Day: Early morning
Day of the Week: Thursday
Month: May
Vacation: New Zealand/Australia
City: Queenstown, NZ
State: Washington
Country: New Zealand
Activity: Either gaming or dancing
Sport: Football
Date Activity: Laser Tag
Way to Show Affection: Nibbling ha ha ha
Band: Queen
Singer: Freddie Mercury/David Lee Roth
Composer: Hans Zimmer
Guitarist: Eddie Van Halen
Song: There are so many!!!! But right now Overwhelmed by Tim McMorris
TV Show: New Girl, The Cleveland Show
Movie: Hmmmmmmmm..... I have no idea
Book: To Kill a Mockingbird
Author: David Eddings/Robin Cook
Shoes: Anything plaid or with high tops
Outfit: Anything lace or plaid
Car: '69 Mustang GT convertible
Weather: Warm and overcast